Interracial couples on how they’re talking about race, love, and Black Lives Matter: ‘The conversation took a – Business Insider India
Posted: June 18, 2020 at 7:52 am
The killing of George Floyd, a Black man who died as a Minneapolis police officer knelt on his neck, has triggered a global conversation about racism, anti-racism, racial bias, police brutality, how non-Black people understand their privilege, and how to be an effective and genuine ally.
But for many interracial couples, conversations about race and privilege have always been part of their lives.
Insider spoke to two couples in interracial relationships on how they met, fell in love, and how race has influenced the way they navigate the world together.
Advertisement
Chelsie, 30, and Bedford, 35, told Insider they didn't think much about race when they first started dating. While Bedford is Black and of Haitian descent and Chelsie is white, they both grew up in Utah which is 90.7% white, and both come from a Christian background. Bedford said that might have influenced their conversation on race as a couple. The only big question on Chelsie's mind when they first met was how Bedford would react to her having a son, which had been a dealbreaker with other dates.
"A little after we had started dating that someone had made a comment to me a little along the lines of 'Well, your kids will never look like you,'" Chelsie told Insider.
"I was like 'Isn't that crazy?' and he was like 'That's actually not crazy. I've had quite a few people break up with me for that reason. Just because their kids will never have blonde hair and blue eyes, their genetics don't necessarily shine through in that way.'"
Since getting married in 2014, they've had three more kids, and now work together as content creators.
We were all meeting at a restaurant and I got pulled over about a block from the restaurant, my family's there, her family's there, we were all together for a birthday.
Because I know that, more often than not, police officers are scared when they pull people over, and some of them are scared of me. So coming in and my wife wanting to fight, scream, yell, be emotional, I'm like "No, this is going to be a whole lot worse if we don't keep our heads."
Bedford: The riots are happening, and we're aware of it. It's disappointing that the riots are happening, but only because riots occur only when people aren't being heard. I understand people are frustrated with things being broken, but at the end of the day, it's been hundreds of years of a demographic, of a group of people who have not been heard.
We had a conversation and she said "Are you scared?" and I'm not anymore scared than I've ever been and I think that was kinda a turning point for her when she realized "this is the unsettledness that you feel all the time, this is how you feel."
Chelsie: I told Bedford, "My fear with the riots is it just makes the police more afraid of you." Because we were talking one time and Bedford said, "You know, it's hard as a police officer in this situation if someone's walking towards you, how much time do you give them to find out what their intentions are?" And that's what's scary for me because I was like, "Well, you have good intentions."
Bree Koegel, 31, met CJ, 35, her now-husband and soon-to-be father of their first child, through their work as fitness models for Wilhelmina.
"This isn't the first interracial relationship I've been, and Bree had known that," CJ said. "I think between her and I, there was this lack of us going into some of those deep conversations because I think we both automatically felt we stood on the same principles."
I look at it from my perspective and said, "Well, if I have things I need to unlearn, better believe the people above me in my family have things that they need to unwind too because they've gone through a lot of stuff in this world too."
I've watched after my conversations and how I saw certain things being handled. It's simple things that I saw like getting into my dad's car on the way to the store and when he turns the car on, it was on a station of a history channel based off of learning about the inequalities of the Black community.
It's difficult to look at your family and see things that you know need to be changed. There's some people in my family who didn't go to my sister's wedding based off of the fact that they didn't want her to marry a Black guy.
Bree: He was like, "I don't know why this is just hitting me different. I know that this happens, and I know that we've seen injustice caught on film before, but this feels different."
Then to see George Floyd days later, and the whole world's reaction, all of a sudden it didn't feel taboo or aggressive to post about it. It was like, "Oh no, you know what? This isn't just a problem inside our relationship to address, this is a problem the world needs to address. If we can expose our conversation to the world, and help them move this along, then by all means with these, our platform to do so."
I think these conversations with me now being empowered and me now, not really giving a cr-p about offending somebody, it's going to change the way that we engage in this world, for the better. And it's going change the way we engage as parents for the better. As scary as everything has been, I'm excited for the revolution, because of what it means for our child.
Some public health experts support protests in spite of the coronavirus risks: 'White supremacy is a lethal public health issue'
A mother and daughter who just graduated from the same medical school are starting their careers as doctors at the same institution
Continued here:
Interracial couples on how they're talking about race, love, and Black Lives Matter: 'The conversation took a - Business Insider India
- What Is a Hormone Doctor? | eHow [Last Updated On: May 4th, 2015] [Originally Added On: May 4th, 2015]
- Learn About Hormone Replacement Therapy [Last Updated On: May 4th, 2015] [Originally Added On: May 4th, 2015]
- Bioidentical Hormone Doctors, Thyroid Disorders, Lyme ... [Last Updated On: May 4th, 2015] [Originally Added On: May 4th, 2015]
- Natural Bioidentical Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT ... [Last Updated On: May 4th, 2015] [Originally Added On: May 4th, 2015]
- What Is a Hormone Doctor? | eHow StemCell Doctors [Last Updated On: June 4th, 2015] [Originally Added On: June 4th, 2015]
- Hormone Replacement Therapy in NYC | NYC Hormone ... [Last Updated On: June 24th, 2015] [Originally Added On: June 24th, 2015]
- Endocrinology - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia [Last Updated On: September 21st, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 21st, 2015]
- AAG Health - Hormone Replacement Therapy | HGH & Testosterone [Last Updated On: September 25th, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 25th, 2015]
- Denver Bioidentical Hormone Therapy Clinic - Biovive Medicine [Last Updated On: September 25th, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 25th, 2015]
- Naturopathic Doctor Phoenix | Weight Loss Clinic ... [Last Updated On: September 25th, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 25th, 2015]
- What is an Endocrinologist? What does an Endocrinologist ... [Last Updated On: September 25th, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 25th, 2015]
- HRT | Hormone Replacement Therapy | Testosterone [Last Updated On: September 25th, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 25th, 2015]
- Endocrine disease - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia [Last Updated On: September 29th, 2015] [Originally Added On: September 29th, 2015]
- Hormone Replacement Therapy - Ideal Physician Weight Loss [Last Updated On: October 21st, 2015] [Originally Added On: October 21st, 2015]
- Hormone Replacement | Fred Bloem, MD Holistic Physician ... [Last Updated On: October 24th, 2015] [Originally Added On: October 24th, 2015]
- How to Find a Bioidentical Hormone Doctor [Last Updated On: November 1st, 2015] [Originally Added On: November 1st, 2015]
- Neal Rouzier, MD The Hormone Doctor [Last Updated On: January 27th, 2016] [Originally Added On: January 27th, 2016]
- Hypothyroidism Diagnosis, Symptoms, and Treatment [Last Updated On: February 2nd, 2016] [Originally Added On: February 2nd, 2016]
- A Natural Progesterone Cream by Resonance Direct [Last Updated On: March 1st, 2016] [Originally Added On: March 1st, 2016]
- Network Of Doctors - Renew Man [Last Updated On: March 21st, 2016] [Originally Added On: March 21st, 2016]
- Dr. Komer, MD - Your Temporary Index [Last Updated On: March 25th, 2016] [Originally Added On: March 25th, 2016]
- Dr. Komer The Komer Clinics - Treatment, Education ... [Last Updated On: March 28th, 2016] [Originally Added On: March 28th, 2016]
- Atlantic Age Management - New Jersey Hormone Doctor ... [Last Updated On: April 3rd, 2016] [Originally Added On: April 3rd, 2016]
- Growth Hormone Treatment [Last Updated On: April 8th, 2016] [Originally Added On: April 8th, 2016]
- Information on Thyroid Disorders | Hormone Health Network [Last Updated On: May 11th, 2016] [Originally Added On: May 11th, 2016]
- Transgender hormone therapy Clinic [Last Updated On: June 8th, 2016] [Originally Added On: June 8th, 2016]
- DIM for Hormone Balance - Healthy by Nature [Last Updated On: June 30th, 2016] [Originally Added On: June 30th, 2016]
- MedHelp - Health community, health information, medical ... [Last Updated On: July 2nd, 2016] [Originally Added On: July 2nd, 2016]
- Hormone Replacement Therapy - WebMD [Last Updated On: July 23rd, 2016] [Originally Added On: July 23rd, 2016]
- Hormone Replacement Therapy Boca Raton - Hormone Doctor ... [Last Updated On: July 23rd, 2016] [Originally Added On: July 23rd, 2016]
- How to Balance Hormones Naturally | Wellness Mama [Last Updated On: July 24th, 2016] [Originally Added On: July 24th, 2016]
- Integrative Medicine Denver | Hormone Replacement Therapy [Last Updated On: August 28th, 2016] [Originally Added On: August 28th, 2016]
- HGH.com - Natural Human Growth Hormone Supplements [Last Updated On: September 5th, 2016] [Originally Added On: September 5th, 2016]
- The Physician Assistant Life - Essay [Last Updated On: September 24th, 2016] [Originally Added On: September 24th, 2016]
- Man vs. Estrogen: It's Not Just A Woman Thing! | Seasons ... [Last Updated On: September 28th, 2016] [Originally Added On: September 28th, 2016]
- Bioidentical Hormones: Dr. John R. Lee's Three Rules for BHRT [Last Updated On: October 5th, 2016] [Originally Added On: October 5th, 2016]
- Endocrinology - Wikipedia [Last Updated On: October 25th, 2016] [Originally Added On: October 25th, 2016]
- TODAY Video - Latest TODAY show clips, news & video ... [Last Updated On: November 11th, 2016] [Originally Added On: November 11th, 2016]
- Hormonal Imbalance Anxiety a Precursor to Other Health ... [Last Updated On: December 7th, 2016] [Originally Added On: December 7th, 2016]
- DIM for Hormone Balance - blog.healthybynaturehwc.com [Last Updated On: December 7th, 2016] [Originally Added On: December 7th, 2016]
- Medicine - Wikipedia [Last Updated On: January 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: January 8th, 2017]
- Steroid - Wikipedia [Last Updated On: January 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: January 8th, 2017]
- Thyroid Disease Manager : Diagnosis and Treatment of Graves [Last Updated On: January 13th, 2017] [Originally Added On: January 13th, 2017]
- Dr. Brian Irwin: BPH is a common but uncomfortable disorder - Conway Daily Sun [Last Updated On: February 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 8th, 2017]
- Hospital adds doctors at Dove's Landing - Oroville Mercury Register [Last Updated On: February 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 8th, 2017]
- Veracyte (VCYT) Enters Agreement with Quest Diagnostics (DGX) to Expand Patient Access to GEC - StreetInsider.com [Last Updated On: February 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 8th, 2017]
- Dear Dr. Roach: Elevated calcium level may signal excess hormone - Herald & Review [Last Updated On: February 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 8th, 2017]
- Endocrine disease - Wikipedia [Last Updated On: February 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 8th, 2017]
- What causes infertility and how can it be treated? - WRDW-TV [Last Updated On: February 8th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 8th, 2017]
- Doctor's Tip: What is the safest cookware? - Glenwood Springs Post Independent [Last Updated On: February 10th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 10th, 2017]
- Nonbinary students confront surgery challenges - Yale Daily News (blog) [Last Updated On: February 10th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 10th, 2017]
- Human Growth Hormone - Rejuvalife Vitality Institute [Last Updated On: February 10th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 10th, 2017]
- Shed pounds to lower the risk - Times of India [Last Updated On: February 11th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 11th, 2017]
- Colorado House panel rejects three GOP abortion bills - The Denver Post [Last Updated On: February 11th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 11th, 2017]
- Dems defeat anti-choice bills - Pueblo Chieftain [Last Updated On: February 11th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 11th, 2017]
- People get test results, have more tests done at Live Healthy 2017 Health Fair - Grand Island Independent [Last Updated On: February 12th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 12th, 2017]
- Physicians' Education Resource Plans Most Impactful Miami ... - PR Web (press release) [Last Updated On: February 13th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 13th, 2017]
- Windsor doctor penalized for 'reckless' narcotics prescribing - Windsor Star [Last Updated On: February 13th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 13th, 2017]
- 'Bathroom Bill' is discrimination - Emporia Gazette [Last Updated On: February 13th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 13th, 2017]
- What's in store: Chronos - bestofneworleans.com [Last Updated On: February 13th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 13th, 2017]
- A lot of blood, for no reason? Common, costly clot test has few benefits - Knowridge Science Report [Last Updated On: February 15th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 15th, 2017]
- Ask the Doctor: Dizziness, Graves' disease, herbal remedies - WNDU-TV [Last Updated On: February 15th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 15th, 2017]
- The Thyroid Problem: How you can identify thyroid issues and free your health - Black Hills Pioneer [Last Updated On: February 15th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 15th, 2017]
- 5 Reasons Real Women Chart Their Menstrual Cycle - Verily [Last Updated On: February 15th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 15th, 2017]
- Holistic Medicine Doctor in Dever, Colorado | BioViveMD [Last Updated On: February 15th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 15th, 2017]
- With health care repeal looming, women turn to IUDs and other long-term birth control - Kansas City Star [Last Updated On: February 17th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 17th, 2017]
- Older women reduce their endometrial cancer risk with weight loss - Fox News [Last Updated On: February 17th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 17th, 2017]
- Chief justice cheers turnout at Longview off-site session - Longview News-Journal [Last Updated On: February 18th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 18th, 2017]
- What's It Like Getting Health Care As A Black Transgender Person? - BuzzFeed News [Last Updated On: February 19th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 19th, 2017]
- The Secret Behind Trump's Flowing Locks - eParisExtra.com (blog) [Last Updated On: February 20th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 20th, 2017]
- Family pushes bill expanding medical training in schools - WBIR.com [Last Updated On: February 20th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 20th, 2017]
- Quick fix: Zeman turns last-place Pescara around in 3 days - The Republic [Last Updated On: February 20th, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 20th, 2017]
- Major study finds testosterone therapy is no fountain of youth - Philly.com [Last Updated On: February 21st, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 21st, 2017]
- Perth doctor Amish Dwarka Singh guilty over weight loss, bodybuilding prescriptions - ABC Online [Last Updated On: February 23rd, 2017] [Originally Added On: February 23rd, 2017]
- Introducing Bio-Identical Hormone Replacement Therapy at Young Medical Spa in Center Valley and Lansdale ... - PR Web (press release) [Last Updated On: March 6th, 2017] [Originally Added On: March 6th, 2017]
- Is testosterone-replacement therapy good or bad? One man suffering from low levels searches for answers. - Men's Fitness [Last Updated On: March 6th, 2017] [Originally Added On: March 6th, 2017]
- Area doctor to launch book on women's health during menopause - Southgate News Herald [Last Updated On: March 6th, 2017] [Originally Added On: March 6th, 2017]
- Obesity May Raise Girls' Risk of Asthma, Allergies - WebMD [Last Updated On: March 6th, 2017] [Originally Added On: March 6th, 2017]
- Doc: Pill's hormone regulation benefits women with PCOS - The Detroit News [Last Updated On: March 6th, 2017] [Originally Added On: March 6th, 2017]
- USMLE Step 1: Postpartum amenorrhea and hormone levels - American Medical Association (blog) [Last Updated On: March 6th, 2017] [Originally Added On: March 6th, 2017]